Psychologist Khakimov: to resolve the dispute, you need to maintain inner calm
During a dispute, one must always maintain inner calm and not humiliate the interlocutor, Denis Khakimov, an expert at the Moscow Psychological Assistance Service, is sure. About other ways to peacefully resolve any conflict, he told in an interview for Evening Moscow.
According to Khakimov, conflicts haunt a person at work, among friends or in the family. However, the psychologist is sure that disputes should not be taken as something negative, since any discrepancy in views is a great opportunity to better understand the interlocutor and improve yourself.
The specialist said that in order to overcome any conflict situation, you need to want its resolution, and this, he noted, will require a lot of effort. Khakimov advised me to clearly define my own position in the dispute and give the interlocutor the opportunity to do the same. In addition, according to him, it is important to be in a calm emotional state. He stressed that one should not try to humiliate the opposite side or speak sharply against it, because in this case, the counterpart will be forced to take a defensive position. The psychologist explained that it is better not to answer the reproaches of the interlocutor, but to “cool your head” and then rationally assess the situation.
Trying to rationally resolve the conflict, Khakimov recommended to remain honest. He noted that if a lie is revealed after a while, this will increase distrust on the part of the interlocutor and prevent finding a solution in a problem situation. The psychologist also explained that in the conversation you need to be active, show interest and offer specific options for resolving the dispute. Reproaches, he continued, will only offend the partner and force him to close himself from frank conversations.
In conclusion, the psychologist warned that not every conflict can be resolved. If it was not possible to convey his point of view to the other side, then he recommended not to take failure personally, since one cannot forcefully convince anyone of something.
Formerly psychologist Sergey Rozanov named ways to confront an unpleasant interlocutor in a conversation. Such people should be treated with pity and sympathy, he is sure.